Singaporean History X

Sunday, September 18, 2005

e' sporean blogs: Fire! Fire!

ZuLdaniaL Listening to: Dygta feat Ira - Cintamu

yesterday night, i had my supper with some of the peeps at our common spot, Al Ameen Upp Bukit Timah... [From now on gonna refer these people as 'the peeps'; (in no favouratism or alphabetical order) bai, shah, fee, an, bien, epul ]

amidst the usual conversation that we usually would have.. i spotted something unusual across the street... being the 'potek' that i am.. it looked like sparks of fire coming down from god knows where... it must be some lantern festival thingie, i thought to myself...

initially it was a few sparks.. as time passes... the sparks turned into balls of fire... dats unusual.. but i saw the faces ard al ameen and everything seemed pretty usual... now dats weird.. am i the only person to find dat balls of fire unusual??

until i nudge fee and asked her wats dat while pointing to the direction.. is it my eyes or dat seemed like wat it seemed....

"eh! terbakar!"

now.. dats what i wanna hear... it is unusual!

do u remember the times while u were in primary school... the teachers used to remind us.. in case of any fire... we are supposed to line up in twos quietly from the smallest to the tallest... thinking back.. i wonder... wats the logic behind it?? do tall people burn slower???

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" Neither fire nor wind, birth nor death can erase our good deeds.... "

~ Buddha (563?-483? BC)

[Siddhartha Gautama] Indian mystic, founder of Buddhism

its true dat good deeds never seemed to be forgotten by the people who received the deeds... u do lots of it... the more significant u become in a person's life...

but from personal experience... these good deeds will fade away in the backdrop whenever u had done a bad deed... or i would refer to as a mistake in this post of mine...

mistakes... humans can never seemed to escape from it... the more u try.. try as u might to escape from making one.. there would surely be a time where mistakes will find their way to u...

but why whenever a mistake is done... a persons forgets the good things that u had done... human character?? i presume so..

humans as a whole would want the best for them... whenever a mistake is done which is to a disadvantage to them... they would change their opinion towards that party... but is it fair?? im sure the other party didnt do these mistakes on purpose... which insane person would wanna fail?? please raise up ur hand! no one?? i rest my case!

i feel that sometimes its just better to evaluate and weigh the bads and the goods... if it seems like the bads outweigh the goods.. it would be clear cut that the party didnt try at all... and if vice versa.. wouldnt it mean.. he had tried but its just circumstances that fails him...

someone once told me... yes... its a small mistake.. but lots of it... will make it big... back then... i was dumbfounded of coz being the person who had made the mistake due to my own unthoughtful act.. but yet again... wouldnt the small good things that i have tried to do.. accumulate to be something big as well... if so.. why is my mistake being the topic that is being questioned...

r u trying to say... ive not done much of the little good things... I AM STILL PONDERING....

i know ive tried so much to change my ways... its not dat i didnt... i dont have a good explanantion to my mistake... the mistake found its a way to me... i know what i should have done.. but i failed to do what my heart tells me to... why?? again.. i dont have a good explanation... ego?? maybe... or am i just making things simple for my part that i failed to think of the consequences... maybe also... no matter how many maybes there could be... it doesnt matter any more does it?? a mistake created... face the consequences...

but yet again... the same person told me.. ppl learn from mistakes.. but i failed to take it as a learning point and i end up doing the mistake time and time again... maybe dats where i went wrong.. but look at it as this way.. do i want to make the same mistake in the first place??

i dont....

3 comments

he' blogs @ 4:39 PM

3 Comments:

fire... interesting. mistakes... errmm... its individualistic. many people learn from mistakes while others just sit to ponder. there are some who created more mistakes while others repeat it. which category r u in? I believes that when that someone mention that many small mistakes makes a lot, what he/she trying to mention is for u to focus on it. why would a person tries to see wat are his/her good deeds if the mistakes are those repeated from previous or r deadly grevious like the past ones? hmmm... otherwise, he/she may wanna convey to you that he/she is just jurt by it.... maybe. conflict, conflicts, conflicts.... ask and yer shall beget answers!

By Anonymous, at September 19, 2005 8:33 AM

hurt... yes of coz... i believe dat person is hurt.. but again.. i quote again from my entry...
"do i want to make the same mistake in the first place??"
"i dont...."
its just circumstances that contributes to a failure... lesson learnt... em still trying my best not to repeat the same mistake again and again...

By Anonymous, at September 20, 2005 12:40 AM

Sunday, September 18, 2005

3 Comments:

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